Hudson P - KOST Cutest Baby Contest: KOST-FM is SO CAL'S FAVORITE SOFT ROCK featuring Ac Mainstream radio live from Losangeles, Ca at kost1035.com
Thursday, May 31, 2012
KOST Cutest Baby Contest
Hudson P - KOST Cutest Baby Contest: KOST-FM is SO CAL'S FAVORITE SOFT ROCK featuring Ac Mainstream radio live from Losangeles, Ca at kost1035.com
Tuesday, May 29, 2012
"Breast is Best"
When I was younger, a teenager, the thought of breastfeeding wierded me out, and for a long time I didn't think I would do it. As I got older I learned that it was the best option for my future babies, and when I became pregnant with Hudson I even looked forward to it. Turns out it's not as easy as some might think. Sadly, it hasn't gone as smoothly for me as I would have hoped. In those first moments after Hudson was born and the nurse placed him on my chest and we had that first skin-to-skin contact, I was proud of how easily he latched on, but unfortunately this was short lived.
Once we were back in the postpartum recovery room, Hudson had a hard time latching on. It was very frustrating. Once, when I thought he had been feeding quite peacefully for fifteen minutes, a nurse came in only to tell me that he was in fact sleeping. I felt so discouraged. After tears of desperation, the lactation nurse gave he a nipple shield. I was so relieved as Hudson latched on and nursed successfully. The nipple shield became my nursing salvation, but the nurses warned me not to use the nipple shield for too long. A warning to which I did not heed.
I used the nipple shield for two months. During that time I realized that it was both a blessing and a curse. A curse because often times Hudson would knock it off while rooting, or I would sit down ready to nurse only to realize that I had forgotten to grab it from the kitchen. It was an extra step to worry about. A blessing because once it was on he nursed well.
After two months I tired nursing without it, and I was happy to find that Hudson latched on well. I would do some sessions with the shield, some without. In early April Hudson soon became very fussy when I tired to nurse him. He would wail and become quite frustrated; therefore, I became equally frustrated. If he did latch on he would only take one side, nurse for only seven minutes or so and then completely reject the other side. I worried that he was not eating enough and restored to pumping and bottle feeding him.
Around this same time I also worried that about my milk supply. I had started back on birth control and felt it was affecting my milk, so I soon stopped taking it and began pumping every hour and a half to try to build it up again. All the while I was bottle feeding Hudson. I would offer my breast whenever I could, but I believe he came to like the immediacy of the bottle. He had "nipple confusion" and there was nothing I could do about it. I was going back to work and he would need to eat from a bottle anyway; I couldn't eliminate it as recommended when trying to fix nipple confusion. It was very hard on me. I missed that special time with Hudson. I felt inadequate, as if I was somehow failing.
Pumping and bottle feeding is double the work. I am now pumping every three and a half to four hours, and thankfully I've been able to pump enough to fill Hudson's needs. Most times it works out that I can pump while he's napping but not always. Sometimes I have to amuse him whilst pumping. It can be a juggling act. I feel like a slave to the pump. I can't go out for more than 3-4 hour stretches because I have to pump.This summer my family plans on going to Disneyland, and I guess I'm going to have to drag my pump along. It's quite confining. There have been many times when I've thrown my hands up and swore I couldn't do it and that I was going to give up on breastfeeding Hudson altogether, but each time I felt like this I got a gut feeling that it was not right and I've pushed forward with pumping.
Thankfully, I am still able to nurse Hudson in the morning. My milk supply is high, so he will take it, and sometimes he will nurse at night before bed as well. I still offer my breast as often as I can, especially on the weekends, but he never drinks enough to satisfy his hunger. I've considered seeing a lactation consultant, but I feel that Hudson is so stuck in his ways, that she might not be able to help me. Perhaps I will still, but if not I will pump as long as the milk is there.
I share this personal story with any mother who may find herself in my position so that she may know that she is not alone. I commend all breastfeeding mothers. It is a major commitment. It's hard, yet in spite of the fact that pumping takes extra work, I am happy to do it. Heck, I'll do anything for my Little Mister.
Once we were back in the postpartum recovery room, Hudson had a hard time latching on. It was very frustrating. Once, when I thought he had been feeding quite peacefully for fifteen minutes, a nurse came in only to tell me that he was in fact sleeping. I felt so discouraged. After tears of desperation, the lactation nurse gave he a nipple shield. I was so relieved as Hudson latched on and nursed successfully. The nipple shield became my nursing salvation, but the nurses warned me not to use the nipple shield for too long. A warning to which I did not heed.
I used the nipple shield for two months. During that time I realized that it was both a blessing and a curse. A curse because often times Hudson would knock it off while rooting, or I would sit down ready to nurse only to realize that I had forgotten to grab it from the kitchen. It was an extra step to worry about. A blessing because once it was on he nursed well.
After two months I tired nursing without it, and I was happy to find that Hudson latched on well. I would do some sessions with the shield, some without. In early April Hudson soon became very fussy when I tired to nurse him. He would wail and become quite frustrated; therefore, I became equally frustrated. If he did latch on he would only take one side, nurse for only seven minutes or so and then completely reject the other side. I worried that he was not eating enough and restored to pumping and bottle feeding him.
Around this same time I also worried that about my milk supply. I had started back on birth control and felt it was affecting my milk, so I soon stopped taking it and began pumping every hour and a half to try to build it up again. All the while I was bottle feeding Hudson. I would offer my breast whenever I could, but I believe he came to like the immediacy of the bottle. He had "nipple confusion" and there was nothing I could do about it. I was going back to work and he would need to eat from a bottle anyway; I couldn't eliminate it as recommended when trying to fix nipple confusion. It was very hard on me. I missed that special time with Hudson. I felt inadequate, as if I was somehow failing.
Pumping and bottle feeding is double the work. I am now pumping every three and a half to four hours, and thankfully I've been able to pump enough to fill Hudson's needs. Most times it works out that I can pump while he's napping but not always. Sometimes I have to amuse him whilst pumping. It can be a juggling act. I feel like a slave to the pump. I can't go out for more than 3-4 hour stretches because I have to pump.This summer my family plans on going to Disneyland, and I guess I'm going to have to drag my pump along. It's quite confining. There have been many times when I've thrown my hands up and swore I couldn't do it and that I was going to give up on breastfeeding Hudson altogether, but each time I felt like this I got a gut feeling that it was not right and I've pushed forward with pumping.Thankfully, I am still able to nurse Hudson in the morning. My milk supply is high, so he will take it, and sometimes he will nurse at night before bed as well. I still offer my breast as often as I can, especially on the weekends, but he never drinks enough to satisfy his hunger. I've considered seeing a lactation consultant, but I feel that Hudson is so stuck in his ways, that she might not be able to help me. Perhaps I will still, but if not I will pump as long as the milk is there.
I share this personal story with any mother who may find herself in my position so that she may know that she is not alone. I commend all breastfeeding mothers. It is a major commitment. It's hard, yet in spite of the fact that pumping takes extra work, I am happy to do it. Heck, I'll do anything for my Little Mister.
Friday, May 11, 2012
Two Things
Just two things I've been thinking about...
#1) My life, for obvious reasons, is very different from what it used to be. For the last three months my identity has been that of mommy, milk-machine, and wife, and last week I took on a new identify, working mother. It was, still is, emotional going back to work, as I knew it would be, but I am lucky I have a job I love. I cannot imagine going back to work if it was not something I truly enjoyed.
#2) I remember, before we had Hudson, when talking to friends who have kids, they would say things like, "It's a lot of work, enjoy your time now. Travel as much you can just the two of you..." and quickly follow it up with an "...but it's great." I never understood these bipolar statements. It was like they were trying to convince themselves that it truly is great. But now I get it. That's what it is like having a baby. There are highs times and there are very low times. Raising a baby is one of the hardest things one will ever do in my opinion. It is mentally draining, physically draining, and these last three months I was home with Hudson were some of the hardest months of my life, but the most gratifying. Hudson brings me a happiness I could have never imagined, and despite the tears, frustrations, and sleepless nights I would go back and do it again, because that uninterrupted time with Hudson, where it was just the two of us truly were precious moments. The most precious of all.
#2) I remember, before we had Hudson, when talking to friends who have kids, they would say things like, "It's a lot of work, enjoy your time now. Travel as much you can just the two of you..." and quickly follow it up with an "...but it's great." I never understood these bipolar statements. It was like they were trying to convince themselves that it truly is great. But now I get it. That's what it is like having a baby. There are highs times and there are very low times. Raising a baby is one of the hardest things one will ever do in my opinion. It is mentally draining, physically draining, and these last three months I was home with Hudson were some of the hardest months of my life, but the most gratifying. Hudson brings me a happiness I could have never imagined, and despite the tears, frustrations, and sleepless nights I would go back and do it again, because that uninterrupted time with Hudson, where it was just the two of us truly were precious moments. The most precious of all.
Friday, April 27, 2012
Dear Hudson :: 3 Months
You are three months old and when I look at you my heart melts. Everyday I ask myself how I got so lucky. You really are growing into such an adorable little guy. I am in love with your smiles and your eyes; you are so lucky that daddy gave them to you, and even though you can't say it yet, I know you love me because I can see love shining in your eyes every time you smile at me. Here are a few things we've experienced together lately:
-You have become so aware of this big world around you, and you love to tell me all about the things you are learning and doing. You have turned into quite the conversationalist. You are most talkative right after you've eaten.
-You get stronger every day. You push up to stand all the time, and you can hold your head up so well. You have a very strong straight back, and you started rolling over to one side just the other day.
-You've stopped sticking out your tongue as often, and instead you've discovered your hands and they have become your new favorite toy. You suck on them like crazy. I'm not sure if your are trying to sooth yourself or what purpose it serves right now. It's not hunger. Mommy's still figuring this one out.
-You've slept in your crib quite successfully during the day a few times, but you're still sleeping with mommy and daddy at night. Once mommy gets a video monitor that she likes we will make the big transition.
-You get hiccups everyday. Daddy says you get it from mommy.
-You do well while driving, and if we are going out as a family mommy continues to sit in the back seat with you to chit-chat and to make sure you have everything you need.
-You think it is hilarious when I clean your booty during bath time...boys will be boys.
-Your sleep cycles are still pretty irregular, some nights you sleep 6-7 hours, other nights you refuse to go to sleep. It's hard on mommy, but I know we will get there.
-Unfortunately, we are experiencing what I think started because of nipple confusion. For the last month you haven't breastfed very well. You will take one side pretty decently, but you absolutely refuse to take the second side. You will only if my flow is really fast, which is only in the mornings. Otherwise you grow impatient waiting for the milk. I started worrying if you were getting enough to eat, so I started pumping and bottle feeding you for most feedings. It's been hard for mommy to deal with. She misses those precious times with you, but at least we still spend our time together in the mornings.
Sadly, I go back to work next week. It makes me sad to think of all the smiles I'm going to miss, but I know daddy will be here taking good care of you and bonding with his little boy.
Saturday, April 21, 2012
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