I've never had to lose weight. Well that's not true. What I mean by that is I've never been dangerously overweight. Yes, I've always had a little extra weight on me and I could have done more in the past to shed excess pounds, but I've never been too overweight. The times I have lost weight I kind of did so without trying. Yes, I hate myself to for saying that. I lost weight easily in the tenth grade when I was running on the track and field team and playing on the basketball and volleyball teams. Then I shed about fifteen pounds again between the time when I started dating Nathan to when we got married. I was on the Love Diet; no joke, just being in love and happy and excited about my relationship seemed to melt the pounds away. Sounds silly, but I swear it happened. Plus, I had a different schedule and could workout at more convenient times.

Soon after we got married, I was hired to teach high school English and my life and schedule completely changed. Working out took a back seat as I planned my lessons and earned my credential. It really is a disgrace to say I went from running/ working out nearly five days a week to only once every four months it seemed. The weight just slowly piled on each year, and I've been teaching for five years now.

When I got pregnant with Hudson I was about fifteen pounds heavier than when I got married, so I was bigger than I should have been. I gained a decent amount of weight during my pregnancy, about 32 pounds. It took about 6 months to get back to the weight I was pre baby, but I looked completely different at that same weight post baby. Everything was softer and looser. To this day, now eleven months after having my son, I haven't done a whole lot to get my in shape and it's catching up to me. Post baby I find that I put on weight much easier.

I also have another thing working against me. About two years ago, while in the process of trying to get pregnant, I found out that I have PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome). PCOS is a metabolic disease which causes those affected to grow benign cysts on their ovaries as well as causing acne and weight gain. Even though I knew this, I didn't blame my struggles with my weight on it, well notuntil tonight that is. My sister Amber was reading an article in Elle Magazine titled "A Rough Patch" about adult-onset acne, from which I also suffer. The article chronicles a woman's struggle to find a cure for this embarrassing ailment. Along the way she discovers she too is plagued with PCOS. Her gynecologist Lebowtiz explains that "people who have the syndrome secrete too much insulin when they eat carbohydrates, which causes the body to lay down fat in the midriff." My exact issue! I mostly blamed PCOS for my difficulties conceiving and my zits, not my weight issues. In the article, Lebowitz also advised that she limit her carbohydrates to 60 grams a day as well.

Lately I've been thinking how I've been able to accomplish every goal I have set my mind to in life. I made and succeeded in all the sports teams I tried out for, I earned my bachelors degree in English, I got a job teaching, I earned my credential, and I've had a baby. So I know that if I truly try and set my mind on losing weight I can accomplish this goal. I know I will need to make some major changes in my life to do so. One being that I need to come to the realization that I truly do need to lose weight, not just for superficial reasons but for health reasons as diabetes is the sister to PCOS. So as this new year begins, a new path begins for me, a path where my health is a priority again. This will require me to make a few changes and alter my way of thinking, but nothing is more important that being happy, healthy, and of course my family. Those are my priorities.