Sometimes I Get Sad

Sometimes the passing of time makes me sad, and today is one of those days. It all started when Nathan put on Yo Gabba Gabba for Hudson. Hudson used to watch Yo Gabba Gabba all the time between the age of nine months to a year and a half. It's been a while since we've put it on and I instantly felt nostalgic. I remembered my little baby Hudson who was just learning to walk, talk, dance and do all those little things I found so cute. I missed it and as I fed Hudson his spaghetti dinner I cried. Both Nathan and Hudson looked at me like I was some kind of crazy pants.

It make me sad that you can look forward to something for so long and it's over in a second. Sometimes when things come to an end I get sad, not right in the moment, but weeks or months later when something reminds me of what was, I'll miss it. Right now I'm missing time with my siblings and being with them and laughing with them about the stupidest and silliest things.

The summertime is always I funny time too. I'm reminded of my youth and my adulthood at the same time. I remember the pool parties, the beach days, the sleepovers, and the carefree attitude of my adolescent summers while I, simultaneously, become aware of how different my summers are now. My life is no longer "carefree." I have a husband, a son, a job, a home, and tons of grown up responsibilities. Yet in return, my life is rich and full of so many wonderful and beautiful things: my husband, my son, my home, my job. So while the carefree summers of my adolescence are gone, I've never cared more for anything than what my life offers me now summer, fall, winter, and spring time.

And there are so many more wonderful and beautiful things to come in future seasons of my life, and when I remember that, I'm not sad.